New year, new outlook

Newness.

Just the word brings light hearted images. I think of dark green grass, baby chicks, freshly fallen snow. Some of you think of January first. Tomorrow is New Year's Day and with that will be many resolutions, hope for a better year, or sadness at the passing of a good year, the end of something and the beginning of something new. I once read that with the first of the year comes a "false sense of being renewed." I think there is some truth to that. However, the fact that we instinctively long to be renewed begs the question-why? Romans 8:18-23 gives great insight:

"What we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later. For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day when God will reveal who his children really are. Against its will, all creation was subjected to God's curse. But with eager hope, the creation looks forward to the day when it will join God's children in glorious freedom from death and decay. For we know that all creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. And we believers also groan, even though we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory, for we long for our bodies to be released from sin and suffering. We, too, wait with eager hope for the day when God will give us our full rights as his adopted children, including the new bodies he has promised us."

You see, our spirit instinctively know we were designed for a world better than this-a world free of suffering, pain, mistakes and death. We are constantly looking for relief of these things we were not intended to encounter. Because Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the garden of Eden, the result is all of this pain we weren't initially designed for. So our spirit is made hopeful at the thought of a second chance, of renewal, of a clean slate. We all want to start over and try to get it right a second time. But January first isn't what will make the difference. Has it before? What were the hopes of January 1, 2011 and the days afterward? No, we need something more than our weak will and a new calendar year.

We need somebody to rescue us.

That's why Jesus came in the first place. When we long for renewal it is a reminder that we need Jesus because only He can truly cleanse us and give us a second chance and the power to succeed at it.

If you haven't accepted Jesus as the one who came to rescue you from your sin, all you have to do is confess to Him that you are in a mess and can't get out of that cycle of making a mess without Him. When you confess your sin, He will be faithful to forgive your sin and He will cleanse you from all unrighteousness-or will wash you of anything that separates you from God. From that point, you need to start reading the Bible. If you don't have a Bible, get one. The best translation is NIV (New International Version). If you can't afford one, for the time being you can use www.biblegateway.com You also need to be in a Bible based church. To find one in your area, here is a good place to start: You can learn more about Assemblies of God churches and where to find them.

For those who have made these steps and are believers, Paul continues in Romans 8:23-28 by saying "We believers also groan, even though we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory, for we long for our bodies to be released from sin and suffering. We, too, wait with eager hope for the day when God will give us our full rights as his adopted children,[j] including the new bodies he has promised us. We were given this hope when we were saved. (If we already have something, we don’t need to hope for it. But if we look forward to something we don’t yet have, we must wait patiently and confidently.)
And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will. And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them."

We long for that day when things will be made right. As believers we have the help of the Holy Spirit to get us through times of discouragement and times when we fail and are failed. We also have the Holy Spirit to intercede on our behalf in order to have breakthroughs. We comfort ourselves with Romans 8:28 so often because the truth of it speaks to the part of us that knows there is more than what is here, there is more than all these things that don't make sense.

For renewal, rely on Jesus Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. Encourage yourself with what the Bible says instead of going by what you feel. Remember, we are pilgrims just passing through. This earth is not our final stop. That's why we long for the ideal, for the perfect things. One day, all things will become clear and we will reach heaven. Begin this new year realizing that the change of the year won't be the answer to your problems, but if you trust and follow Jesus closely, this year will be great nonetheless.

From the Drought

Did you know that Thanksgiving feasts happened in the colonies after there had been a call to fasting? History.com's article on Thanksgiving states on the second page of the article,"Pilgrims held their second Thanksgiving celebration in 1623 to mark the end of a long drought that had threatened the year’s harvest and prompted Governor Bradford to call for a religious fast."
The first settlers (pilgrims) had fasted because their crops were being threatened and they were praying to the God of the harvest to intervene and save them and to bring a harvest that they could rely on through the winter. Without it they could possibly and probably die. When God was faithful to hear their petitions and met their needs not only by having just enough for them, but blessing them in abundance, they gave thanks. They gave thanks with what God had provided them-the way He had answered their prayers. They held a feast. This reminds me that our best thanksgiving comes out of our worst droughts. When we go through hard times, we seem to listen harder for the voice of the Lord as believers and we tend to think more about eternal things, as humans. Whenever there is a long drought in your own spiritual or emotional life, a time of fasting may be in order. Rest assured though that the drought and the fasting won't be forever. And when it does end, give thanks. Thank Him by using what He has blessed you with. If it is food, have a feast. If it is a job, give above your tithe to your church. If it is restored health, give of your time and energy to others. Whatever you do, thank Him. After all, thanking Him for His goodness is what praise is. That is not reserved to the last Thursday of every November. This Thanksgiving, do not just gorge yourself on turkey and familial angst. Focus on the Source of your bounty-trust me, if you look you will find bounty in your life. You find what you look for.


I will sing to the LORD, because He has dealt bountifully with me. Psalm 13:6


I will praise God’s name in song and glorify him with thanksgiving. Psalm 69:30

Sing to the LORD with thanksgiving; Psalm 147:7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6

The Promise Keeper

Tonight as I was standing in church, I looked around the sanctuary right as the music began and we stood. In that moment, I wasn't just looking at my church family. The Lord reminded me of dreams these people have...that are not yet reality. The one who relocated his family here for a job, only to be looking for work when the economy shifted. The one who has a specific calling and passion but the time isn't right and they are still being faithful to do what they can with what they have until the tide shifts. The one who has unanswered questions, lingering doubts, and is even a little angry at God-not understanding why they are in the place they are. I could go on with the shards of hearts that I saw as I looked at God's Bride. We forget that we are not the only ones who are working through a season of plowing. A season of watering. A season of growth. We plow. We water. But it is God who makes us grow (1 Corinthians 3:7). We hate plowing. We hate the work of watering. And we hate the growing for a different reason. We are not the grower. We are the one being made to grow, and in that we find a whole new set of things we find uncomfortable.
Tonight, it was as if I saw a basket. All of us have these seemingly random dreams that are seemingly unmet. But it is all of our lives that will come together-woven- to magnify the Basket Weaver. His plan for each of our lives will come together to form one plan and that plan is His kingdom here on earth as it is in heaven. So there are two things I realized/remembered tonight: I am not the only one waiting on dreams to come to pass, and all of our lives will come together for one purpose: to glorify Him. Be sure, God will be glorified (Philippians 2:10-11). So we have that hope that our lives surely will come together.

As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. Isaiah 55:10-11

You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed. Joshua 23:14

When God Whispers

All day Mammaw was on my mind. I just felt like I needed to go by her house and see her. I hadn't seen her this week or talked on the phone with her since Tuesday. My mom and I went by after our day out of shopping for a wedding gift for a lovely friend of mine. Mammaw was surprised to see us and genuinely pleased to have us come in (more than usual). Though she told us of her worries, and mentioned that she misses my pappaw and sometimes wonders what he'd look like now if he were still with us, our visit was pleasant and before we knew it, Mom and I had been there for several hours. We caught up on plans for the holidays, joked about various things and laughed heartily. She kissed us goodbye and gave us warm grandmotherly hugs, and said with a satisfied tone "I sure am glad you girls came by today." Mom and I returned the gesture and waved goodbye with smiles on our faces and enjoyed the Sugar Maples still ablaze in their Fall splendor. But just a moment ago I looked down at my phone and saw the date. November 5th. And it registered with me: Today marks sixteen years since the death of my pappaw, my grandmother's beloved life partner.
Listen to those whispers of the Holy Spirit. A lonely soul, a hurting heart may be the reason for His nudges.

Be blessed on this November evening.

Trusting God With A Dream Deferred

As I hear the rain tonight, I am reminded of a word that was spoken over me by Mrs. Paton this past Spring...

It was a personal thing as most events like that are, but the gist of it is this: I'm like a little girl with her face upward in the rain of the Holy Spirit, just waiting and yielding myself to whatever He wants to do in my life. I'm dancing in the puddles and smiling because I am being washed in the Spirit and filled with joy.

I am also reminded to slow down, to relax the muscles that have been tensed and to release my hopes to Him, unafraid. It is a scary thing to continue dreaming after they fail to come to pass. Upon the death of one of the largest dreams of my life to date, I asked God the popular question "Why?" I asked what I was supposed to do and where I was to go from here. But He didn't tell me any of that. What I did hear Him say was even better. In that still, small whisper (a lot like tonight's sweet rain), In response to my challenge "What do I do now that this dream is dead?" His answer was gently Am I not the God of resurrections? I then remembered the story of Lazarus. He had been sick and so his sisters sent word to Jesus to come so that Jesus could heal him. But Jesus waited two more days before He headed to the city of Bethany. When He did finally leave, He already knew that Lazarus was "asleep" in death but He said that Lazarus's sickness wouldn't end in death. When He got there Lazarus had been dead for four days. The sisters were deeply upset at Jesus, saying things such as "If you hadn't waited so long he wouldn't be dead. You could've healed him!!" Jesus wept with them even though He knew what was going to happen next. He loved them so much that He wept at the thought of their grief...and perhaps at their lack of faith. You see, they thought backwards. They thought that Jesus could heal sickness but not death in this life. They thought it was too late for anything to be done. But Jesus longed to show them that not even death could limit His power. If Lazarus had not died, God would not have been glorified as greatly in that situation. Jesus even said “Lazarus is dead, and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe.” (John 11:14 & 15)
Sometimes things have to die in order for our belief to be aroused. Sometimes things have to die in order for us to be convinced that Jesus really does care about what concerns us. And sometimes, dreams have to die before we will put them in Jesus's hands and allow Him to breath His life into them.
He asked them to lead Him to where Lazarus was buried. They removed the stone and Jesus called him by name and commanded him to come forth. Glory was given to God as the people were greatly amazed. People were even added into the Kingdom because of it.
You see, your revived dream with God's touch is better than a living dream with your touch.

Hearing the soft rain landing on the roof reminds me that God speaks in the small things such as a child's soft "I love you" and He speaks in the big things such as the death of a hope or a dream...and bringing it back to life- life surrendered to His will. Are you experiencing a time in between where you thought you would be at this time and where you actually are? Are you experiencing what seems to be a dead end road, a change in seasons in life or an unexpected hurt? I leave you with the Holy Spirit's words to me. Am I not the God of resurrections? The longer you know Him, the more you will find it true that yes, indeed; He is.

Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Jesus

Sometimes the hardest place to be is broken at the feet of Jesus. But I am learning that He will do whatever it takes to bring me into deeper intimacy with Him. That includes brokenness. I am learning that my frustration and hurt and sense of loss comes from the nasty head of entitlement. Instead of thanking God for what I have and who I know and what and who He has brought into my life, I have been angry for what has not come. Lord, forgive me. I am not entitled to marriage or a certain job or even the pursuit of happiness. I have been given life, liberty and the ability to pursue Jesus and be pursued by Him. I have been given awesome friends and family and a great church. I have been given a good job in easy working conditions, friendly co-workers and great hours. I have been given more than I deserve and spared from most of what I do deserve. I know what it is to be content-its through Jesus and His strength He daily gives (my paraphrase of Philippians 4:12-13).

Whatever He chooses to give me is serving a purpose. I live to glorify Him-not to understand the reasons behind everything He does. I know that what He does is for His glory and for my good. I have to trust that even when things don't always make sense. He is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all we could ask or think (Ephesians 3:20).


Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say it is well, it is well with my soul.

When Things Don't Go As Planned

I have been working as an assistant preschool teacher for a month now. But you thought I was going to school to be in ministry, you say? I did indeed. Don't worry, I didn't change my major again when you weren't looking. I simply cannot find a job doing what God has called me to do.
So instead I work at a job that has worn my body down and that I am almost passionless about (just being honest here). I do it because I need the money and I do it because this is what God has provided for me right now. But do I love it? No. Do I want to do this for the rest of my life? No. I'm told that this is life. This is the real adult world-working just to pay the bills and not finding joy in what you do. But if this is true, why did I go to school and pay all of that money?! If this is true why did God even give me a dream or a vision or a passion or a way to achieve it? And if it is true, why do I know it my heart it is a lie?
I am really trying to understand that I cannot understand. I am really trying to appreciate where I am. In most areas of life, I am appreciative. And I am appreciative that I have a job at all especially after not having money for important things in the past and after being at home sick all day today. But I'm not passionate about it. It's not what I'm best at or what my heart longs to do. I know this is a season. I pray it is a mighty short one.

Between the almost and the not yet. That's where faith is built. That's where the squares of hope are sewn together. That's where trust is birthed and grown.

In the waiting I am helping with the awesome youth ministry at my church, excited about it's future while phantom pains of what used to be and has been erased lingers in my heart. I am on the tight rope of expectancy and hope for the future and sadness of the past.
These days that's where I find my self in this place where things don't go as planned.