What Are You Committed To?

I have said that I have loved. I have thought that I have loved. I have thought that I knew what love is. But I haven't. I didn't.

I thought that by expressing my feelings, that being quiet, that letting myself get trampled on, that going out of my way for someone was loving. But the Lord told me that until I truly loved, until I truly got it, I would not be able to understand how to love myself, how to love my future husband, how to love my children and most importantly-how to love Him.

The past four years specifically have been used by the Holy Spirit and the influence of godly heritage to teach me how to love and to be love and to show love. The following line from Warren Barfield's song 'Love Is Not A Fight' has struck me in a vulnerable place: To some, love is a word that they can fall into. But when they're falling out, keeping that word is hard to do.

I have learned SO much in this time. The biggest thing is that love has NOTHING to do with what you "feel." Jesus Himself didn't feel like dying for us. Luke 22:42 tells us He prayed "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." Love wasn't about what He "felt" like doing, but what He was committed to. He was committed to the will of the Father. I'm fairly certain that it is safe to say my mother didn't "feel" like holding my hair back when I threw up when I was little and sick with the flu. But she did it. Why? Because she made a commitment to me. She LOVES me.

A godly woman I have had the privilege to grow up around once told me "Love is not a feeling it is a committment-not based on how I feel now or tomorrow but a promise that no matter what, I will put your best interest first."
C.S. Lewis stated that "Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained."

So you see, in a very small nutshell, love is not about me. Putting others first no matter what, loving the unlovely, is what it is about. After all, "We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19 (Italics mine)